Every year, we have this saying "out with the old and in with the new".. "I'm going to change my life".. "my new years resolutions will be...". Not me.. not this year. It's taken me a long time to see it, but every year will be the same to some degree, not exactly the same.. but every year there will be pluses and minuses.... that's just life.
This year for me, was a huge learning curve, a journey of discovery and I had many highs and many more lows. The lows were really low, losing my little dog Pickle was the start of the bad, I was devastated. Finances hit an all time low (I imagine for many, not just me), losing family members, illness hit three of my friends terribly as well as my mum and dad... but we all plodded on but we all got through - thank god. Due to circumstances I was unable to spend time with my friends like I have previously, but it was an eye opener, through that, I have found out who my fair weather friends are and who are my friends through thick and thin. Luckily enough, most of the the people I call my friends seem to be good people.
My life changed, hugely. From being a dreamer, someone who just plodded along wondering "what if" and "maybe one day", trying to keep everyone else happy and putting up with the "hand that I'd been dealt", I went to being a "go-getter", I chased my dreams and finally after many years of wandering in the wilderness of life (haha.. how dramatic)... I found myself again!
Financially things are slightly improved.. the challenge of a new job presented itself to me in October.. and yes.. it is a challenge, it's not what I thought I would be doing.. but its all good and I'm learning daily.
My modelling has gone from strength to strength.. despite a few obstacles in the shape of people known as "haters", I'm doing well.
I discovered one of those haters, who I actually thought was a nice girl and who had asked to photograph me right back at the beginning of the year, not only was playing the sticks and stones game, but had been calling people up late at night to discuss my personal business.. not that she had a clue about my personal business.. because THAT.. I keep PERSONAL!!
Another one, the one that really caused me problems, played a hand in preventing me from getting two paid contracts.. believe it or not.. by sending malicious emails to a) a magazine and b) a lingerie company, telling them that I was some kind of prostitute and porn star... You have to laugh really, if I had have been either, I wouldn't have had some of the struggles I had this year, I might have even got away on that holiday, as I say, you have to laugh!!!
Sadly, the lingerie company mustn't have wanted to take the risk, after a very "well worded" email, I never heard from them again. But the magazine was very good, saying that they supported me but to be aware that someone was slandering me.. they passed it over to their legal department. Needless to say, and sadly to say, when work comes up that does have the potential of being "something", I no longer share my excitement on public networking sites.
See... I AM learning.
Through my modelling work, I've met some really nice people.. I can honestly say, I've made friends with people who's paths would never have crossed with mine before, really nice people.. other models, mature, not so mature, male and female, photographers and their wives/partners/husbands.
I've also managed to catch up with some of my friends recently, and that's been really cool.. a few of us went out in December for S.G.'s Christmas Party (I don't work there anymore as doing that with everything else, it became too much), I saw my best friend Sharon a couple of days before Christmas and I also went to seen M'Lady (Anne) on Boxing Day. So, it's all good.
And, on that note, to all my family and friends and those of you I don't know... I'd like to take this opportunity to wish you a wonderful night tomorrow, at the very end of 2013. Whatever you may be doing, stay safe, and have a wonderful, healthy, prosperous and happy new year.. remember, we're never to old to follow our dreams.. Make yours count for you .. I am going to keep on going, keep on smiling, keep on working.. and make the most of this crazy thing called LIFE... why.. because it's mine.. and at last, I can xxx
H A P P Y 2 0 1 4
